The Great Word Purgation: #8

As culture develops and technology rapidly unfolds, our language must keep up with global development. Without a properly delineated nomenclature within a given field of growth, verbal anarchy ensues and any advancement finds itself mired in a veritable Babel of terms. Universality is key in communication, and if our language does not keep pace with growth, we are quickly outpaced by the small minority that can speak its terms and parse its jargon.

I have NO idea what that opening paragraph meant. But I can't think of any words in there I want to get rid of.

But here's one, though it sticks in my craw that I even have to elevate to the status of 'word' so that I can give a size 12 boot out of the lexicon. The word is... not a word. It's an idiotic jumble of letters and numbers that mean something to pimply faced, socially retarded 13 year-olds who should be out exercising. It also applies to pimply-faced, socially retarded, overweight 35 year-olds who seriously need to get out and exercise. And find a girlfriend. And get a job. And bathe. Seriously. Please bathe.

That .... ahem... word is, as you may have already guessed, has officially been accepted by Merriam-Webster (Fie! For shame!) as a 'word' for 2007: W00t, (or 'w00t', or 'W007', or
'Senator John Edwards').

A close scrutiny of its etymology quickly determines its pedigree. It is neither Latin, nor Greek, nor even Hungarian (which is making a fashionable come-back these days). Rather, its roots come for the international community of online gamers who want to shove things in the face of others.

Remember those days in high school gym, when the class bully, after humiliating you out on the football field, would further humiliate you by removing his sweaty jock strap and slip it over your head when you weren't looking? Yeah. Neither do I. But still, someone must have suffered from it, and this exclamation of 'w007' is the stinky jock-strap of the triumphant nerd. It's an 'In your face, beeeyatch', just without all the typing.

So where does it come from? Some give it a Scottish heritage, which I personally find compelling, but highly dumb. Others attribute it to the infamous (and Satanic. But that's only because I could never understand it) Dungeons and Dragons game, where a pipsqueak would often pipe up 'Wow! Loot!' Whenever he rolled a 24 sided die and it came up odd, red, and on number 22, thus earning him lots of money because he placed money on it. I think. I may be mixing games up here. But still.

Whatever its peculiar provenance, there's only one thing I can say: I will risk never becoming an 'l337' (that's an 'elite', for all of those who have actually grown up and done something useful with your lives. I get it, and maybe you do too, but it's dumb) and ever use 'w007' in a sentence.

Now it's time to play WoW ( That's 'World of Warcraft').

I'll take a bath later.